"To observe that life is absurd is not an end, but a beginning."

I saw a short video on TV this evening where a girl had just blown out her candles on her birthday cake. Whoever made the cake had put some sort of remote controlled/activated flip-top mechanism in it so that when she was sort of leaning over it, most of the icing on the top of the cake flew up into her face. I LOVE shit like that.

My brother-in-law is having a birthday in a couple weeks. It's going to be on Friday, April 13th, so it's a surprise "Friday the 13th" themed party with bad-luck themed decorations and such (black cats, open umbrellas indoors, spilled salt, broken mirrors, ladders to walk under, etc.). I would LOVE to be able to make an exploding cake like this for his party.

If I can pull it off, I won't tell ANYONE about it and just keep the remote in my pocket and set it off at the appropriate time. That way no one will see it coming and accidentally ruin the joke... plus I think the surprise would be on everyone else nearly as much as on my brother-in-law. I think several of his cousins might wet their pants laughing, and I'm all for laughing so hard that you lose control of your urinary sphincter!

Unfortunately, in order to make this work I need to find some sort of spring loaded mechanism that can be activated by remote control, is small enough to place in the cake under the icing, and is strong enough to propel a decent amount of icing about a foot or so. I've done some random internet searches for things like small remote controlled jack-in-the-boxes (no, they don't exist), but I'm drawing a blank here. I can't find what I need and I can't think of anything that could be adapted to this purpose.

Does anyone have any ideas as to what sort of device might lend itself to this evil purpose? Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks! ;-)

Current Mood: devious

This is our newest cat, Sophie. She is superbly ugly. We adopted her from Animal Rescue. Her back story is that she came from one of those houses where the owner hoards animals and there were apparently 80 cats or so there. As some of you may know, Bart and I only adopt cats with physical and/or emotional problems... Sophie is no exception, though we didn't realize the full extent of it for some time.

She had an upper respiratory infection as a kitten which spread to both her eyes. That's why she always looks like she's squinting at you. She has scar tissue in both eyes and the pupils are a bit crossed and mishapen. Sometimes I think she has trouble finding stationary objects, like her smaller toys and she's not very good at judging jumping distances. This same illness caused scarring in respiratory tract as well so she snores and snorts rather loudly and often sports that annoying "nose whistle" thing when she exhales.

In addition, I think she has some sort of Irritable Bowel Syndrome because no matter what we feed her, she always has stinky diarrhea that can make your eyes water. She also vomits fairly often, backing up as she does so, leaving a loooooong line of vomit for us to step in later. She is a shameless butt-licker and consequently has abominable halitosis to top everything off. And she likes to sleep on my face.

Sophie is also an attention hog. She regularly chases poor Dottie (who has the soul of a wildebeest) and steps on Marty's head (soul of a lion) to pick fights. For these and innumerable other reasons I have decided that Sophie has the soul of a hyena.

But we love her anyway... someone has to, I suppose!

Yeah, the Senator Theater in Baltimore is about to be auctioned off as well.

People are going to be sorry when they wake up one day and the only places to go are Wal-Mart, McDonald's and Starbucks.

Current Mood: cynical

Attention all Baltimore Slightly Irregulars!!!

Remember how much you coveted all those awesome sideshow pieces when we went to the Dime Museum in Baltimore two years ago? Well, they apparently have not been able to solve their financial woes since their closing and are liquidating the majority of their assets on February 26th, 2007 at 5pm EST.

I am so there...

Those of you for whom a trip to Charm City would be exorbitant, not to mention last minute, will be happy to know that it is being simulcast as a live auction through ebay.


I noticed that not EVERYTHING is listed to be sold. Notable exclusions would include the Fiji Mermaid and the Gum Statue, but there's still a ton of crazy stuff going up for sale... like that scent recorder machine, a sea devil, that big fat guy mannequin, a couple mummies, the deer with the laser on its nose, several creative squirrel taxidermy motifs, various signage, just to name a few. I think there's nearly 300 items listed.

I'm wondering what sort of turnout they'll get for this thing. I just happened upon it myself, but they don't hold an auction like this everyday.

I'm distressed that the Dime Museum had to close its doors and sell all its shit, but if it's going to happen, I guess I'd like to have a piece of it at my house.

I'm interested to hear your thoughts on the matter. Also, if there are any choice pieces that you wanted, you could give me a heads up about what they are and what your maximum bid would be and I'd be happy to act as your proxy bidder since I plan to be there in person.

Current Mood: contemplative

Hey, all!
My internet connection at home is TEH CRAP right now. We don't get a good signal except at VERY off times when no one else is using the internet. Consequently, I have not been able to read or comment in LJ for over a week.

Hopefully I will be back in the swing of things soon. :-(

If I ever make a movie, I want it to be just like Octaman. No, I want it to BE Octaman. This film is a cimematic masterpiece light years ahead of its time.

I also want an Octaman costume so I can wear it to family functions... like easter dinner and my nephew's eventual baptism.

Here's a link to my Flickr account so you people can check out my hot photos from this past weekend. This should serve the dual purpose of partailly satiating your hunger for news of the awesomeness that was Horrorfind 2006 & the Baltimore Slightly Irregulars Tour and whetting your appetite for my forthcoming narrative write-up.

Enjoy!

Current Mood: blank

This is me acting the fool at the National Museum of Dentistry!

I know I need to do my mighty write-up about the Slightly Irregulars Tour and Horrorfind 2006, but I think I'm still letting it all soak in and recovering from the intense awesomeness. In short, I will write about it, but not today.

Instead I will do this meme from serizawa3000:
Go here and look through random quotes until you find 5 that reflect who you are or what you believe. Repost in your journal and tag 5 friends.

1. Living hell is the best revenge.
Adrienne E. Gusoff
US teacher, humorist and greeting card writer

2. Efficiency is intelligent laziness.
Anonymous

3. I believe that every human has a finite number of heart-beats. I don't intend to waste
any of mine running around doing exercises.
Buzz Aldrin (1930 - )
Astronaut

4. My loathings are simple: stupidity, oppression, crime, cruelty, soft music.
Vladimir Nabokov (1899 - 1977)

5. Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Albert Camus (1913 - 1960)

I guess I'll tag: dr_ninjapants, ghostgecko, drworm, kleenexwoman and lily_lemony

Current Location: On my ass
Current Mood: bored

Here's a pic of Mason Thomas Pugh, born this evening at 5:51pm, 8lbs. 13oz., 21" long:





And guess who was right there through the whole thing holding my sister's right leg up in the air and counting reassuringly... Yeah, that's right! It was me. My mom said she knew paying for all my college tuitions would pay off someday.

Current Mood: chipper
Current Music: "That's When I Reach for my Revolver" - Mission of Burma